Some time ago I found an image of a children’s book from the 1930’s that began, “A is for Anchor, B is for Boat.” It was so cool the way it went through the whole alphabet, telling a story in rhyme about a child’s ocean voyage. It was a deceptively simple structure; when I messed around with it a little I found it challenging to find an appropriate word to come out to the right number of syllables and rhyme with the next line and keep it all relating to one theme.
So I really wanted to seriously try my hand at something like it but had to put the project aside for awhile. I’ve also been wanting to write on the subject of money. Now that I have a chair to sit in, I picked it up again in my morning writing time. It’s been so fun and as tough as I thought it would be. But I’m finally happy with it after a week of work and I think you’ll like it, too. Read it out loud to a friend — it’s great fun.
A few quick notes:
1. “Regan” is pronounced “REE-gan,” referring to rich King Lear’s daughter.
2. For the letter “P,” you need to use your prurient imagination. I’ve censored the word here but the truth is, the word I chose is the perfect word for that letter and it has to stand. I apologize if you’re scandalized, but in a poem, every word is important.
3. For those uninitiated, “yayo” is cocaine.
Now you really wanna read it, right?? Have fun. I sure did.
© Mary Fons
A’s for Acquire
B is for Bentley
C is for Champagne corks that pop gently
D is for Driver
E is for Ever
F’s for a Futures trading endeavor
G is for Gucci
H is for Heirs
I is for Interviewing au pairs
J is for Joneses
K is for Keeps
L is for Laurels for Triple Crown leaps
M is for Money
N is for Now
O’s the Odd Reference on the ship’s lacquered prow
P is for P—y
Q is for Quarrels
R is for Regan in this season’s florals
S is for Scotch
T is for Tsar
U is for Uncle’s Cuban cigar
V is for Victor
W for Win
(X is for nothing and never has been)
Y is for Yayo lines on the yacht
Z is for Zelda Fitzgerald you’re not