PaperGirl Blog by Mary Fons

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My Little ‘House Of Cards’ Problem.

posted in: Art, Day In The Life 30
NOT GOOD. Image: Wikipedia.
HERE WE GO. Image: Wikipedia.

 

Sometimes my sister Rebecca will mention a hugely popular movie or a television show and I’ll say, “What’s that?” and she will smack her forehead and roll her eyes and say, “You are unbelievable.”

A good example of this was La La Land. We were walking along a few months ago and La La Land was apparently what every last person on the planet was talking about but I had literally never heard of it. When Rebecca discovered this, she groaned. “How is that possible?” she said, shaking her head. “Are you like in the world?”

Yes, but I just don’t see many movies and I don’t have a television. And though I definitely consume visual media, it’s not super mainstream media most of the time. I love to watch documentaries. I very much enjoy watching lectures and educational content on YouTube while I sew. Oh, and I’ve seen every episode of The Great British Bakeoff at least twice. But the big shows like Game of Thrones, Scandal, or [insert show here], I just sort of don’t get sucked into that stuff.

Except. Except for this one dark, gripping, tension-filled, beautifully rendered, twisty-turny, Shakespearean blinkin’ show called… House of Cards.

Mercy, that show is good.

It was all Claus’s fault. A couple years ago, he started watching it and wouldn’t stop talking about how incredible it was. From the opening credits to the storyline(s) to the cliffhangers, he just went on and on about it. I finally decided to give it a chance, even though Mom said she and Mark tried to watch it but couldn’t get past a couple episodes because “the characters were just such awful people, honey.”

Yeah, no kidding. Murder, treachery, mutiny, little lies, big lies, enormous lies — the characters in House of Cards are more dastardly and dirty than the meanest Blackbeard-ian pirates that ever sailed the high seas. But they’re fascinating. I don’t know when I’ve ever been more into a television program than House of Cards. Kevin Spacey is irresistibly wicked. Robin Wright is terrifying and beautiful. I’m in love with the character of Doug Stamper, which, if you know the show, is super weird. But what can I do? He’s so wrong, he’s right.

The reason I’m bringing this up now is that Washington, we have a problem: Season 5 is starting at the end of this month.

This means I am about to be obsessed with watching a television show again and I was enjoying not having to deal with that, honestly. It’s kind of stressful. You see, I started watching the House of Cards when there were nearly four seasons already made and available to stream on Netflix, so I started at the beginning and watched episode after episode after episode until there were no episodes left to watch. I watched that show like it was my job. I’d start in the evening and I would watch it until 2:00 a.m., then dream about the show when I fell asleep! It was crazy.

Now, since I’m caught up, I have to see the show and then wait?? For an entire week??

Rebecca, this is why I don’t do this kind of thing. But if you want to get caught up on House of Cards, I would love to come over to your place and watch it together. We can eat popcorn and watch the pirates run amok!

 

Have Board, Will Skate.

posted in: Day In The Life 8
How do they do that?? Photo: Wikipedia.
How do they do that?? Photo: Wikipedia.

 

Greetings from Westchester County, New York.

I have been in three states this week and I am resting up in this hotel room so that I can do two days of lecturing at the fabulous Northern Star Quilt Guild’s “World of Quilts” (WOQ) quilt show. If you’re in the area, you’d better getch’er tushie down/over/up here because there are vendors, demos, and something like 200 quilts ready to be viewed by 2,000+ people when the show opens tomorrow at 10 a.m. The WOQ show has been going strong since 1989 and I am honored to be a part of it this year.

In other news, I would like to talk about skateboards.

Actually — no. First, I want to tell you why I would like to talk about skateboards.

You may have noticed that this blog is updated regularly. These days, I’d say I’m posting 4.87 times a week. What this means, according to my arithmetic, is that if you click on my blog each day — you gorgeous, brilliant creature, you — roughly 70% of the time you’re going to find something new to read.* That number a little under my target of 5.6 posts per week, but with all that goes on in my life in a typical 24-hour period, I’d say it’s pretty good.

To help myself churn out such sparkling content (ho-ho!) week after week, I keep a running list of ideas on my computer. I don’t refer to the list every day, nor do I add ideas to it every day. But when I find myself with the time and inclination to blog but without a specific target in mind, I’ll check the list. Here is about half the list right now:

  • the time I did transcription work
  • Alexander the Great wore linen armor!!
  • the benefits of a degree in theater
  • everyone skateboards (“ca-chunk, ca-chunk-ca-chunk”)
  • the Wikipedia entry for “Mary”
  • Britney Spears in Las Vegas
  • apologize
  • Hannah letter to the editor
  • first kiss
  • “nabadana”

I’ll work my way through them, you can be sure. You might even decide that you have nothing better to do with your life than make up some kind of PaperGirl bingo card and play with your friends and neighbors! Every time I write one of the posts on the list… Okay, I don’t know how bingo works. I’m sure you could figure it out, though and I’d like to personally thank you for inspiring me to write the “PaperGirl bingo card.” I am inexplicably happy about that configuration of words.

Okay, so skateboards.

They’re absolutely everywhere. The other day, I realized that one of the major sounds of the city these days — as common as taxi honks, car alarms, the whoosh of the El — is the “ca-chunk! ca-chunk! ca-chunk!” of a skateboard as a rider whizzes by on the sidewalk. (The “ca” is the front wheels hitting the sidewalk seam; the “chunk!” is the sound when the back wheels cross it.)

When did the profligation occur? Skateboards have been around a long time and of course I have seen (and jumped out of the way of) many of them in my day. But there are way more right now and I’m curious as to why. Another interesting phenomenon is that though there are more skater boys than there are girls, there are so many girls who get around this way! I see them all the time. It’s pretty cool.

And that’s it. That’s what I wanted to say about skateboards. So…

Bingo.

 

*If that math so wrong it’s not sort of sweet but just embarrassing for everyone, please let me know. Thank you! — The Management.

Homespun Handcraft by Ella Shannon Bowles (Part Two!)

posted in: Art, Quilting, Word Nerd 17
"Square In a Square" quilt, c. 1880. Probably Pennsylvania. Image: Wikipedia, courtesy Los Angeles County Museum of Art.
“Square In a Square” quilt, c. 1880. Probably Pennsylvania. Image: Wikipedia, courtesy Los Angeles County Museum of Art.

 

Yesterday, I introduced the great book I found in a used bookshop. I promised to include an excerpt from the chapter on quilting and I kind of didn’t know what I was getting myself into.

The chapter on the “Old-Time Quilt” is really good. It’s so good that I tried to pare down the excerpt I selected but really could not force myself to cut out a single line! So I was typing for some minutes and you’ll be reading for some minutes, but I wouldn’t have kept typing or suggest you keep reading if I didn’t think it was worth it.

Here’s some of what Ella Shannon Bowles had to say about quilts back in the day. Remember, she was writing in the 1930s about “old-time” quilts in the “pioneer days.” I would go back to the text and pin down the exact years/timespans she’s talking about but I am very tired and still have homework. Let’s just call it “the nineteenth century” and call it good enough.

Enjoy. And may you all have full snuff boxes (!) and a “jolly feeling” all week.

“House-keeping was the goal of every girl’s ambition and her “setting out” was planned for years. When she had assembled a number of quilt-tops, a quilting was held. To it were invited every woman and girl for miles around. Usually the housewife planned to get the quilting out of the way before haying. The quilting-frolics, with their accompaniments of good cheer and jolly feeling, had an important social significance.

Before the guests assembled, the quilting-frames were brought in from the loom-shed. They were long pieces of wood, held together with wooden pegs thrust through gimlet-holes to form a rectangular frame large enough to hold the quilt. The frames were wound with flannel, serving as a foundation for sewing the quilt in place. First, the frames were placed upon the floor and the lining sewn in and pats of wool laid evenly upon it. Then the frames were carefully lifted to the tops of four kitchen chairs, and placed under each corner at such a height as would be most convenient for the workers. Then the patch-work top was laid across the wool-pats and pinned evenly all around the edge. Skeins of blue and white linen thread, braided to prevent snarling, a spool of red thread from the store, a needle-book, wax, and scissors were arranged on a table for the convenience of the quilters.

As early as one o’clock in the afternoon the guests began to arrive. The quilt-pattern was duly admired and then the consideration of the stitches to be used in the quilting was taken up. “Cat-a-cornered” and herring-bone stitch were favorites in rural parts of New Hampshire, though the pine-tree was liked by expert needlewomen. The women who could not gather about the quilt knit or worked on their own sewing. Tongues chattered as fingers flew and soon the quilt was ready to be rolled over the frames as far as finished. During this interval snuff-boxes were passed and then the guests who had not quilted drew up to the frames. When the last row of quilting was reached, the married women left the frames and, with jokes and rippling laughter, the girls began a contest to see who should set the last stitch. The damsel lucky enough to do this would be the first to take a husband!

Now the quilt was taken from the frames, shaken and folded and admired. Mrs. Rollins tells us that the finishing of a quilt was a gala day for the neighborhood. “It was unrolled and cut out with much excitement,” she says. “When Hannah took it to the porch-door to shake it out, the women all followed her, clutching its edges, remarking upon the plumpness of the stitched leaves, and the fineness of its texture. It was truly a beautiful thing, for it was the growth of the farm, an expression of the life of its occupants, a fit covering for those who made it.”

After the  men of the family were given their supper, the table was spread with a diaper-wove huckaback tablecloth. The cherished china was brought out and platters of cold meat, puffy biscuits, tarts, pound and plum cake were set out for tea for the quilters. Guests helped “clear up,” and then the husbands and the sweethearts came to take the women home.”

Homespun Handcraft by Ella Shannon Bowles (Part One.)

posted in: Art, Chicago, Word Nerd 6
The book! Scanned by me.
The book! Scanned by me.

 

I found a gem today.

There’s a neat bookstore called Selected Works in the Fine Arts Building on Michigan Avenue, halfway between home and school. (I’ll talk more about the Fine Arts Building another time; that gorgeous building needs its own post!) My friend Justin said that all the books at Selected Works are half off right now, so after we were done at the newspaper office, Justin, Sophie, and I made our way over to check the stacks.

In the craft and home decor section, I found a copy of Shared Threads: Quilting Together — Past and Present by Jacqueline Marx Atkins, a title I definitely needed for my quilt book library. It seemed Atkins’s book was the only quilt-related selection on the shelves but then I spied a sweet-looking, tattered little volume called Homespun Handicrafts. As I lifted the other books out of the way to get at it, I thought, “I’ll bet that book is pretty old. And I’ll bet there’s a chapter on quilts.” I was right on both counts: The book, written by Ms. Ella Shannon Bowles, was published in 1930 — and there is a terrific chapter on quilts.

I was right on both counts: The book, written by Ms. Ella Shannon Bowles, was published in 1930 — and there is a terrific chapter on quilts. Here are the chapters, which I will list because they are great:

I. BASKETS, AND BROOMS [sic] II. HER HANDS HOLD THE DISTAFF
III. THE WHIRR OF THE WOOL-WHEEL
IV. THE THUMP OF THE BATTEN
V. THE CLICK OF THE KNITTING NEEDLES
VI. HONEST STITCHES
VII. MY SAMPLER SPEAKS
VIII. AMERICAN EMBROIDERY
IX. THE ROMANCE OF OLD-TIME QUILTS
X. FINE WORKS
XI. FOLKLORE IN HOME RUG MAKING
XII. THE ANCIENT ART OF NETTING
XIII. LACE LORE
XIV. CANDLE-DIPPING DAY

Great, right?

“Her Hands Hold the Distaff” is almost the best chapter title ever written, but since the quilt chapter gets the word “romance,” I’m gonna say it’s ours by a nose. The book is not a how-to; it’s an account of “pioneer handcraft…which lent so much grace and homely joy to the struggles of the colonists.” (I think/hope “homely” meant something less negative in 1930?)

Isn’t it great to find new old books? Isn’t it cool to go to a used bookstore and find something that you never, ever would’ve known to look for in a library but is exactly what you needed to find?

Tomorrow, I’ll excerpt some wonderful stuff from the quilt chapter; for now, here is an excerpt from the forward:

The study of old-time American handicrafts is a trail winding on and on into delightful bypaths and unexpected turnings. It is difficult for an enthusiast to cease telling the stories connected with these homely arts of our ancestors, so I have limited myself to describing those crafts in the development of which women have played an important part.

It is my earnest wish that this book may serve not only as a guide to the old-time arts, but that it may stimulate the reader to understake the serious study of the development of the crafts of our foremothers as have such workers as Mrs. Atwater, Mrs. Sawyer, and Mrs. Taylor.

I sincerely believe that knowledge in craftsmanship will add beauty to everyday living. Laurence Sterne once made a statement as true in the twentieth century as it was in the eighteenth. He said, ‘What a large volume of adventures may be grasped within this little span of life, by him who interests himself in everything, and who, having eyes to see what time and chance are perpetually holding out to him, as he journeyeth on his way, misses nothing he can fairly lay his hands on.’

May I leave this message with you?”

 

 

 

Airport Sundry Shop Despondency.

posted in: Day In The Life 12
Image & Style magazine's April 2016 cover featuring "Mob Wives" Marissa Jade. Image: Wikipedia.
Image & Style magazine’s April 2016 cover featuring “Mob Wives” Marissa Jade. Image: Wikipedia.

 

I am at the Raleigh-Durham airport. My flight is delayed at least an hour because the rest of the country is beset by storms, apparently. I left my phone charger at the retreat center, I accidentally packed my computer cord in my luggage, I’ve got a half bag of turkey jerky in my purse and no contact solution to squirt into my dry eyeballs: Welcome to the glamorous life of a sewlebrity.

Aw, it’s fine. I’m just being dramatic. (But there really is turkey jerky in my purse and my computer really is going to die before too long, here.)

The truth is, I’m in a pretty good mood, considering. I spent 36 hours with a group of salt o’ the Earth women down here in North Carolina. It appeared they had a good time and learned things from me; the opposite was true, too.

I had a conversation with two of the ladies on the front porch last night; I won’t soon forget it. We talked politics and it was so good. I rarely ever broach the topic, as you know, but from time to time, the mood is right, and so it was last night. The three of us talked about how we voted, how we feel about how we voted, and how important it is to keep talking to each other across party lines, across our life stages, across our city mouse/country mouse locations. We have to do this if we’re gonna make it. I thanked them last night for the meaningful chat; I thank them both again now.

My hopeful, optimisticky mood took a hit a few hours ago, though, and I blame the newsstand at the sundry shop here at the Raleigh-Durham International Airport (RDU). My love of magazines and books is no secret: I was the editor of a national magazine for four years; I am currently associate editor of my school’s newsmagazine; I have written two quilting books; I am writing a book of essays. If I got any more in love with magazines and books, why, I’d marry ’em!

But the magazines and books at the RDU sundry shop made my stomach hurt. Here’s what was there and how I felt about what was there:

  • Romance novels — not where my interest lies*
  • Super-crazy expensive business books with titles like, “Who Stole My Pickles?” and “The Accelerator’s Handbook: The Only Business Advice You’ll Ever Need. Ever. Really.” — no way
  • Magazine after magazine with photoshopped models making truly ridiculous fashion faces — this is still a thing
  • Magazine after magazine freaking out about everything — WE GET IT
  • Magazine after magazine about tech or computers — #TylonolPM
  • Magazine after magazine for dudes — gross

And I really needed to get something to read because hello: no phone charger, no computer cord. The clock was ticking, man. I finally found a book worth buying: White Trash: The 400-Year Untold History of Class in America, by Nancy Isenberg. Thank goodness. This book is at the top of a zillion “Best Of” lists and looks fascinating, so as this computer dies out, I can read instead of watching that kid over there by the water fountain spin around in circles until she falls and bonks her head and cries. Again. Because that’s happened twice. She’s actually pretty cute, but I’m getting dizzy.

Fade to black.

 

*In the original post, I used the words “Trashy romance novels.” This was offensive to several folks, so I edited it. We regret the faux pas. — The Management

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